Newt Gingrich says there will be an American base on the moon within eight years. He also expects to have men on Mars in the near future. Experts call his predictions lunacy (get it?), but I think we should run with this.
What got America its start? Taking land. And there's a giant chunk of it, unclaimed, right up there in the night sky. And who has more of a right to it than the country that got there first?
Here's the plan. We start out on the moon to get our method of space colonization in order, just like we did with the original 13 colonies. It should be much easier this time around without any pesky natives. Aside from the space industry boosting our economy like WWII did, I'm sure there are some valuable minerals to be mined. While there is a treaty that says no country should exploit lunar resources, no spacefaring nation has signed it. However, America has signed a treaty stating no military installations are to be built on the moon. We'll have to find a way around that. Regardless, we'll be back on top in no time!
Once that's up and running, we can set our sights on Mars. Mars! The Red Planet will look so much better with some white and blue in there. The best part about space colonies is that there will be new land out there for the taking. Anyone (who can afford a trip to space) will be able to establish their family in the New New World, just like America's founders did when they came over from Europe. It could be a whole new aristocracy!
Here's the best part. There's at least one theory holds that the name Allah, as in Islam's name for god, comes from the title "al-" and the name of a pre-Islam Arabic moon god called Ilah. What better way to win the War on Terror than to stick an American flag right in their god's face? Vote Newt!
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